Headstones, explained without a sales pitch
Most families order a headstone once, under time pressure, while grieving. The industry knows that. Everything here is written so you can walk into that conversation knowing what you are looking at.
Is the veteran eligible for a free VA headstone?
Six questions covering discharge, service length, Guard and Reserve rules, date of death, and the state of the grave. Handles the November 1990 rule that catches most families out.
Settle it before anyone needs it
The VA will decide burial eligibility while the veteran is alive and hold the decision on file. Free, one form, and a checklist of what else to settle while there is no rush.
What does it cost to set a headstone?
Setting fees, foundations, permits and delivery, itemised by marker type and region. These are the charges that arrive after you thought the price was settled.
Three things worth knowing before you order
- The cemetery decides what is allowed, not the dealer. Size, material, colour and finish rules vary between cemeteries and often between sections of the same cemetery. Ask for the regulations in writing before you choose a stone.
- The quote you are given is rarely the whole bill. Foundation, setting fee, permit and delivery are commonly separate line items. Make each seller break a quote into the monument, the engraving, and the installation.
- If the veteran qualifies, the stone itself is free. The VA furnishes a headstone, marker, or bronze medallion at no cost, including in private cemeteries. It does not pay to set it in the ground.
Planning ahead
- Pre-need eligibility determination — get the answer years early, on one free form
- Who can be buried in a national cemetery — including spouses, children, Guard and Reserve
- Every burial benefit and its form — six of them, and none arrive automatically
- The burial allowance — a reimbursement, not a payment to the funeral home
Headstones and markers
- VA Form 40-1330 — the claim form block by block, and what actually causes the delay
- Medallion or second stone — you get one, not both. How to choose.
- Marker types — every option the VA offers, drawn to scale
- Presidential Memorial Certificate — free, automatic, and you can ask for extra copies
Researching an ancestor
- A free headstone for a veteran ancestor — for service ending before 1917, anyone may apply. You don't have to be family.
- Finding a veteran's grave — the free tools first, and what each one will and won't tell you
- Civil War and Confederate headstones — the original designs, still made to the 1870s patterns
Records, cleaning and repair
- Every discharge document the VA accepts — the DD-214 is not the only one, and it only exists from 1950
- How to get a DD-214 — free, three ways, and how to have a burial request expedited
- How to clean a headstone safely — the official method, and what will damage the stone permanently
- Replacing a damaged marker — free, and it applies to stones set decades ago
Stone & Marker is independent. We don't sell headstones, take commissions from monument dealers, or pass your details to anyone. Information here is compiled from VA and National Cemetery Administration publications, National Archives guidance, cemetery fee schedules and published industry pricing. It is general guidance, not advice about a particular grave.